Bianca Bonnie, Childhood Trauma, & Trauma Bonds

If you are into celebrity television, then you may have seen the latest episode of Marriage Bootcamp: Hip Hop edition. In last week's episode Bianca Bonnie (Chicken Noodle Soup Song) of Love & Hop Hop New York, opened up about her past childhood abuse.

“When there is inconsistency in belief and action (such as being violated by someone who is supposed to love you) our mind has to make an adjustment so that thought and action are aligned. So sometimes the adjustment that the mind makes is for the victim to bring her or his behavior in line with the violator since the violator cannot be controlled by the victim. Our greatest source of survival is to adapt to our environment. So increasing emotional intimacy with a person who is forcing physical intimacy makes sense in our minds. It resolves cognitive dissonance.”- Rosenna Bakari

During the show, she mentioned how she was abused by a trusted family member. This is such a common narrative among #blackfamilies. Single mothers rely heavily on family members for childcare support oftentimes leaving children more susceptible to abuse, unintentionally. See the video clip below from the episode. 

What I saw immediately with Bianca's story is how her relationship w Chozus (who is struggling with his own past traumas) was a clear example of #TraumaBonding.

Trauma bonds are rships where we repeat the same dynamics we experienced in childhood with a parent or caregiver through a romantic partner or w to close friend.

April is #ChildAbuseAwarenessMonth and I will spend this month sharing with you facts, signs, and consequences of child abuse.

To learn more about Trauma bonds or to sign up for the free child abuse training on 4/7/20, 6PM CST click here FREE TRAINING to sign up for the free child abuse training on 4/7/19, 6 PM CST.

'Marriage Boot Camp: Hip Hop Edition' airs every Thursday night only on WETV. Check your local listings for more information.